Honey Do Lists: The Thing That'll Most Likely Cause Me to Bludgeon My Future Wife to Death

Remember when you were little and you'd wake up on a Saturday morning ready to relax, play some Sega and maybe school your neighbors in some pickup basketball? And do you remember how devastated you were when you strolled down stairs that same morning to find your mom with a list of chores that she wanted you to complete before any relaxation took place? Or she announced it was spring cleaning day and would start divvying up a bunch of random tasks to whoever was unlucky enough to be in the house?

Ugh, that was the worst. Good thing we're adults now & don't have someone else forcing us to do random shit that we hate doing.

Except that in some cases there are very pussified men out there who do have this going on. Apparently they allow their wives/girlfriends/lifemates to give them "honey do lists." They might as well bend over and let that person stick a giant dildo up their ass at the same time.

I hope no woman ever tries to give me a "honey do list" and pass it off like it's a cute little reminder of things to do around the house. The name doesn't fool me; you're basically trying to be like my mom and force me to do shit I don't wanna do. Either that, or you think I'm some giant idiot who can't remember simple tasks that I eventually need to complete. Either way it's insulting and makes me feel like I'm 5 years old all over again.

I'd say I feel bad for all the guys out there who have to deal with this, but they obviously set the precedent by allowing this the first time around. Enjoy a lifetime of "don't forget to clean the basement while I'm at the salon (insert smiley face)."