So it's finally sunny and hot in New York. Seems like I should be happy about this right? I mean I've been waiting for this for months. Only thing is it smells like hot garbage and feces outside. Yes, there is nothing quite like garbage day in New York in the summer time. I've never been to a live horse sex show in Tijuana, but I imagine it would smell pretty similar to the stench I smelled this morning on my walk to work. Just smelled like steaming piles of sweat and horse piss and shit all over the place. I literally almost threw up when I walked out my apartment this morning. And this is precisely why I hate this city.
A typical year in New York goes something like this. Spend the first few months in weather that's so fucking cold I feel like my dick is gonna break off when I walk outside. Also, throw in a few blizzards where there's like two feet of snow. So go ahead and chalk up a couple afternoons and early mornings to digging yourself and your car out of piles of bulldozed snow. Always a good time. Then after a few months of freezing your balls off and trudging through disgusting slushy filth, spring comes! And it fucking rains every day of your life for two months. So yeah, finally it's like 50 or 60 degrees. Not too hot, not too cold. But by the time you get wherever you're going, you're totally soaked. And you've just gone through a fucking minefield of puddles and obnoxious people with giant umbrellas.
Then summer rolls around, and all of the sewage and grime and grossness inherent to this cesspool of filth starts to melt together and smell like absolute death. Nothing like paying exorbitant rent prices to live in a shoe box and be in a constant state of discomfort. Greatest city in the world? I think not.
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